Irritating idiot Chris Evans grasps Top Gear role

Thursday 18 June 2015 @ 8:52 am

With Clarkson, Hammond and May refusing to return to Top Gear, the BBC has offered the top job to smug, self satisfied git Chris Evans who wasted no time in accepting despite categorically ruling himself out just a few months ago. That’s the end of Top Gear then.

I’ve no doubt Evans is a petrolhead and car fanatic but his boring car columns for the Sunday Mail are about as enjoyable as a 1970’s Lada Riva. Same for his Radio 2 show and pretty much everything else he has fronted.

The problem with Evans is that he is neither entertaining nor likeable and his cheeky chappie style of delivery is just plain irritating because he always comes across as a smirking idiot with an ego that has its own passport. He’s too far up his own backside and is endlessly boasting about his wonderful Ferrari collection. The few occasions he has been a guest on Top Gear are completely forgettable and you just know that the format will not be the same. Can you imagine Evans during one of the epic challenges such as driving across the Middle East in a convertible or the cross-country America road trip? No, me neither.

So in short, Top Gear with Chris Evans will be crap and God help us if the co-presenter is Jodie Kidd who serves no useful purpose other than ticking the inane BBC diversity checkbox.

Australia has the right idea – turn them back or let them drown

Monday 8 June 2015 @ 11:48 am

The tide of asylum seekers, bogus migrants and other assorted unwanted scum trying to cross the Mediterranean to enter Europe has hugely increased over the last few months leading to a mad scramble for self-righteous do-gooders, lefty liberal halfwits and clueless EU bureaucrats to help these bastards across.

The UK duly played its part in this sickening pointless charade and sent a Royal Navy ship to offer a first class taxi service to The Scum. I didn’t even know the UK had any ships left after spineless Cameron cut the defence budget to the bone in favour of ring fencing the useless fucking international aid budget for paying off corrupt regimes.

Here’s what I don’t get. Why is the Royal Navy plucking illegal immigrants from the Med and then escorting them onto Italy? By all means pick them up if you really must (better to leave them alone though – with any luck they’ll drown) but then take them back to Libya or Turkey or wherever they decided it was a smart idea to cross the sea in an overcrowded rickety old boat with a napkin for a sail. By offering passage to Europe along with food, shelter, clothes and as many sandwiches you can scoff, all that we are doing is encouraging this tide of miserable grasping chancers to ever more desperate acts in crossing the Med so they can eventually reach the Land of Milk and Honey. Eldorado. The pot of Gold at the end of the Rainbow. Or the UK as it’s commonly known around the world to those looking for a soft touch Western Country that will provide a translated map to the benefits office along with free housing.

What’s even more of an embarrassment than having a Royal Navy masquerading as a glorified taxi service is to then hear the captain of the Royal Navy vessel crow about the “rescue mission” as if it was a key operation vital to the well being of the UK. Never mind that we barely have any ships to patrol the seas, the very last thing we should be doing is sending our meagre resources to assist in the bogus asylum seeking racket ensuring the UK is open to all and sundry.

As usual, Australia absolutely has the right idea on immigration. All migrant boats are turned back, absolutely nobody is allowed asylum if they happen to make it to shore and for those who end up drowning, tough, it was your choice so it’s your problem, don’t expect any safe passage or a free trip to the hospital.

Time for those in Europe and the UK to grow a pair and show a similar hard line approach but don’t hold your breathe. The liberal left elite have fewer balls than a Eunuch on HRT.

Want to join Daesh? Fine, sod off and don’t come back

Monday 1 June 2015 @ 3:03 pm

Why on earth is the UK Government trying to prevent gormless half-witted imbeciles from leaving these shores to go join Daesh? It’s a handy way to get rid of all the clueless fundamentalist nutjobs, dickheads and ranting mullahs so just let the dumb fucks go and immediately revoke their passports so they can’t return.

If they want to go live with a ragtag bunch of savage backward country hick bastards, let them. And when Jihadi Johnny Bin Fuckwit Al Britani starts bleating about wanting to come home, fuck ’em. He can stay right there with Daesh and enjoy the life that he was so eager to sample.