Random Annoyances: Smug Self Satisfied Dieters

Saturday 7 June 2014 @ 8:57 pm

Now I’m not a fat bloke by any means and have no need to diet. However, it still irritates the hell out of me when I open the paper and there’s yet another article about some smug, self satisfied dieter who managed to lose a ludicrous amount of weight in a short space of time.

I’m not talking about those who are genuinely overweight and take the slow and steady route to lose the fat but those poncy dieters who make out that all it took was a change in food and a couple of sessions at the gym with a personal trainer for the weight to miraculously melt away within a month. You know the ones; the editor of Men’s Health or some writer for a glossy woman’s mag who hasn’t got anything better to write about.

Never mind that these miracle dieters never mention the cost of the gym, the personal trainer and the weekly grocery shop or the hours spent preparing carb free food, cleaning the kitchen afterwards as well as every other spare waking hour spent exercising like a bunny on drugs leaving precious time for anything else. I suppose if you don’t have a proper job, you can well afford to spend all day at the gym getting ripped.

And why do they always use those feckin’ irritating before and after pictures that show the person looking like a slob with messy hair, crumpled clothes and acne and then another shot of them one month later looking like they’ve just had a makeover? It’s like the “before” shot has been purposely taken to make them look as unflattering as possible to big up the “after” shot. Why? What’s the point? Are they trying to lose weight or audition for a commercial advertising spot cream?

Let’s be honest here folks. Nobody with an ounce of common sense is going to spend several hours a day at the gym followed by a meticulous grocery shop to buy overpriced organic crap to make pretentious meals that take an hour to prepare and then another two hours to scrub the oven clean afterwards.

You wanna lose weight? Eat less and exercise more. Simple.